It’s quite rational that you are indecisive. Even people who desperately want to have kids don’t know what’s ahead of them. Having a child is always different than what you expected.

I wanted them at 20, at 35 — not so much. But I was already pregnant, so there was no way out ☺ I had them because it was time I was afraid I’d miss not having them one day. But I could already see my future life childless and was completely fine with it.

The first few years were hard with two babies. Your life changes completely. You dom’t sleep, you’re often afraid, and irritable. Then you realize there’s a chance you won’t be able to find your old you. But that’s all normal. It’s gone. You give up a lot for the new life that drains you.

I love my life now. You never know what parenting is going to be like. It’s hard, boring, agonizing, and heart-warming. Children give you the kind of connection you don’t have with grownups. In them, you project your fears and dreams until you accept them as they are. Flawed.

You make mistakes and feel sorry for the little creatures raised by the imperfect you.

But if you don’t have kids, that’s great. There hasn’t been a better time not to have them ☺